Most people communicate from a “What’s in it for me” perspective.
They rarely look to find the common denominator of both parties – and even if they do, it is usually artificial and not done from a place of integrity.
If this sounds familiar and you want to learn how to deal with these people, keep reading.
You see, if you want to start communicating in a way that both gathers the person’s attention and compels them to advance with you to a common goal, you need to practice FLOW-based communication.
First of all, what is FLOW exactly??
Flow is the intersection between being challenged and being competent enough to handle this state at the same time.
So in which situations will Flow communication usually serve you the most?
In situations like:
- Business meetings
- Job Interviews
- Harsh talks with family\friends
- Discussions with partner
This is not to say you won’t benefit from being in FLOW during your day-to-day convos – but they are less stressful in general.
Now, here’s where FLOW state conversations come to your aid:
- You’ll be more natural
- You’ll feel more in your element
- The right words will come to mind at the right time
- You’ll analyze the situation much faster
- You’ll almost read the other person’s mind
And so on. It is a very powerful state to be in.
In order to get into the FLOW state efficiently, and especially during important conversations\communications, it must be practiced beforehand in neutral states.
IE -> Let’s say you’re cooking a dish, focus all your attention on the movements you make, the slicing of the ingredients, to the right amount of seasoning, and the perfect way to cook each element.
This will help you enter the state of flow, it’s very easy to identify once you’re in it. (and now you’re aware of it)
Over time, increase the range of activities through which you are practicing entering this state.
This could be playing an instrument, writing a document, doing assignments at work – and so on. This will help you understand how this state feels like, and induce it on command.
Now, before entering essential conversations, such as those mentioned above, you’ll be ready for the initiation sequence.
What you’ll need to do is remember one such situation where you were experiencing complete flow -> and remind yourself of that feeling inside your body.
This might sound strange but bear with me.
When you remind your body of the positive feeling of FLOW, you’re creating that feeling of flow again in the moment.
The body doesn’t differentiate between imagination to reality – so you’re essentially conditioning yourself to enter flow on command.
By doing this, you’re allowing yourself to come into the conversation in a higher state of mind, that is willing to let go of controlling the communication, and instead, make it natural and flow-like.
Instead of making it about dominating the other person, you’re able to subtly enter them into your frame, the confident frame, the more laid back which is sure of itself, and not coming from a place of harshness and force.
The flow state is a mighty state to study and implement in your life.
I talk about it in more depth in article #3 inside Limitless Magazine – you can grab a copy here to master the flow state: